Saturday, December 8, 2007
Friday, November 16, 2007
amazing quote
Enjoy this amazing quote passed on to me from my roommate Miss Shephard:
“It doesn’t interest mw what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your hearts longing.
It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dreams, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring you moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life’s betrayals, or have become shriveled and closed from fear or further pain.
I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it, I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own; if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, or to remember the limitations of being human.
It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself. If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. I want to know if you can be faithful and therefore trustworthy. I want to know id you can see beauty, even when it is not pretty every day, and if you can source your life from its presence. I want to know if you can live with failure, yours or mine, and still stand on the edge of a lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, ‘Yes!’
It doesn’t interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and so what needs to be done for the children. It doesn’t interest me who you are, or how you came to be here – I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.
It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself, and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.”
-The Invitation, Oriah Mountain Dreamer, Indian Elder
“It doesn’t interest mw what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your hearts longing.
It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dreams, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring you moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life’s betrayals, or have become shriveled and closed from fear or further pain.
I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it, I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own; if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, or to remember the limitations of being human.
It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself. If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. I want to know if you can be faithful and therefore trustworthy. I want to know id you can see beauty, even when it is not pretty every day, and if you can source your life from its presence. I want to know if you can live with failure, yours or mine, and still stand on the edge of a lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, ‘Yes!’
It doesn’t interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and so what needs to be done for the children. It doesn’t interest me who you are, or how you came to be here – I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.
It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself, and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.”
-The Invitation, Oriah Mountain Dreamer, Indian Elder
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
SPU gymnastics
Seattle Pacific University just got a new athletic website.
It is really neat, check it out:
http://www.spufalcons.com/index.asp?path=gym
It is really neat, check it out:
http://www.spufalcons.com/index.asp?path=gym
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Happy Times
Kasey Jo's 1983 Birthday Bash
Our totally RAD spandex and leg warmers
Little White Lies
OOOOOOOOOREGON!
Carrying on Aubrie's "Dinner in a Pumpkin" Tradition
They have had some practice at this crazy Nawlins holiday!
Miss Sullivan's Art Club
STEP IT UP: Rally to stop Global Warming
Guest Speaker: Presidential Candidate John Edwards
Second Line down the highway
Lizzy and I decided that John Edwards needed some Mardi Gras Beads...
Who knows, someday we may be able to say we gave our beads to the PRESIDENT
I think the guy on the left was more excited about it,
but I don't know, I think I see a smile coming from Mr. Edwards
Our totally RAD spandex and leg warmers
Little White Lies
OOOOOOOOOREGON!
Carrying on Aubrie's "Dinner in a Pumpkin" Tradition
They have had some practice at this crazy Nawlins holiday!
Miss Sullivan's Art Club
STEP IT UP: Rally to stop Global Warming
Guest Speaker: Presidential Candidate John Edwards
Second Line down the highway
Lizzy and I decided that John Edwards needed some Mardi Gras Beads...
Who knows, someday we may be able to say we gave our beads to the PRESIDENT
I think the guy on the left was more excited about it,
but I don't know, I think I see a smile coming from Mr. Edwards
sicky sick
I have spent more time in my bed, watching TV, sleeping, on the internet than I have in longer than I can remember. I hate being sick...my head pounds, I can't stop coughing, my throat hurts, and my voice is ridiculous. I went to the doctor and got some medicine it better be kicking in here soon. Luckily I already had a three day weekend to rest, but I am out of school today. I feel kind of guilty not going to school. But I guess I wouldn't be that much of a help without a voice.
This past week was very rough. My kids are out of control, I am really struggling. I just do not know what the answer is. I have been asking for advice, but it always seems like what they say I already know. They tell me I am too nice, but I guess the problem is I just don't really know how to make that change. These kids don't know much about respect because it is not a trait that they see everyday. Kids pick up on things and if they are not exposed to respectful behavior they aren't going to show it themselves. I know my kids can stay quiet and listen, because I see them do it with other teachers. I was so frustrated one day I asked them, not really expecting an answer, why they do not stay quiet when I am talking and little Jamiya said it was because I am too nice. It blew my mind - such opposite thinking - I would have the desire to respect the nice person more instead of less. Its obvious it is something I need to work on if my kids are picking up on it. I just need them to work for me or really work for themselves!!! How do you teach kids work ethic, how do you invest them in their education. Right now I need to get them through this week and when we come back from Thanksgiving make some major changes.
This experience has been such a different challenge than all those I have faced in the past. My hard work has always made me successful. I have made goals and accomplished them with excellence. This is a humbling experience - I cannot be great at everything. Its just hard because I know that my success at his is not only effecting me, but the education of 15 little kids. My core mentor told me the only way to fail is to quit...I know that will not happen.
I feel like I am being such a downer right now...
On a more positive note, KJ IS COMING!!!! Only 3 days until she comes, I can hardly believe it! It is going to be so fun! I better be completely healthy by then. She will be here for an entire week so we will have lots of time to explore. I have professional development on Monday and Tuesday, but they shouldn't be too long of days.
This past week was very rough. My kids are out of control, I am really struggling. I just do not know what the answer is. I have been asking for advice, but it always seems like what they say I already know. They tell me I am too nice, but I guess the problem is I just don't really know how to make that change. These kids don't know much about respect because it is not a trait that they see everyday. Kids pick up on things and if they are not exposed to respectful behavior they aren't going to show it themselves. I know my kids can stay quiet and listen, because I see them do it with other teachers. I was so frustrated one day I asked them, not really expecting an answer, why they do not stay quiet when I am talking and little Jamiya said it was because I am too nice. It blew my mind - such opposite thinking - I would have the desire to respect the nice person more instead of less. Its obvious it is something I need to work on if my kids are picking up on it. I just need them to work for me or really work for themselves!!! How do you teach kids work ethic, how do you invest them in their education. Right now I need to get them through this week and when we come back from Thanksgiving make some major changes.
This experience has been such a different challenge than all those I have faced in the past. My hard work has always made me successful. I have made goals and accomplished them with excellence. This is a humbling experience - I cannot be great at everything. Its just hard because I know that my success at his is not only effecting me, but the education of 15 little kids. My core mentor told me the only way to fail is to quit...I know that will not happen.
I feel like I am being such a downer right now...
On a more positive note, KJ IS COMING!!!! Only 3 days until she comes, I can hardly believe it! It is going to be so fun! I better be completely healthy by then. She will be here for an entire week so we will have lots of time to explore. I have professional development on Monday and Tuesday, but they shouldn't be too long of days.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
What really is going on?
I know I am supposed to be the adult, the responsible one, the role model, but sometimes I seriously cannot help but laugh at the ridiculous things that happen EVERYDAY at school.
A snapshot of today or I should say a snapshot of the things that happened in about 15 minutes during today.
Student one: Copying down his spelling words writing bitch instead of batch.
Student Two: Hiding under my umbrella that is opened in the back of the classroom.
Student Three: Jumps up on the desk and does a round-off off the side.
Student Four: Pulls out a large ceramic cross out of his book sack (that’s backpack for all you NW folks)
Student Five: Is crying like a baby because she got detention for hitting someone.
Student Six: Is actually doing her work.
Student Seven: Is following me around like a lost puppy.
Student Eight: Writing on the white board in the back of the classroom because I told her not to write on the front board. (really what I meant was you should not be writing on the board at all)
Student Nine’s Grandma: Says I remind her of Mariah Carey.
Student Ten: Laying on the floor.
Student Eleven: Saying “no” to every phrase that comes out of my mouth.
Student Twelve: My encouragement - "Come on buddy, get your work done" and the response, "I want a big Mac"
And I had a few absent students today. Luckily, even when everyone is present, I do have a small class of only 15. I am so thankful that. I cannot imagine adding more to this Sullivan Circus.
Even though we obviously have a long way to go, I see glimpses of greatness from my students. For a few moments today the classroom was so quiet, it was incredible. Every student was busy doing what I asked them to do. Working hard, moving forward, being successful. What a crazy job this is, what crazy kids these are! I have found that the day runs a lot smoother if I allow time for my kids to simply be kids. They unfortunately do not have recess and somehow my class got jipped out of PE and Art, so each day I give them a little free time. Today they started to teach me the Soulja Boy dance. If you have not heard of it – check it out on www.YouTube.com then imagine Miss Sullivan doing this dance surrounded by all her little babies, who are by the way much more coordinated then I will ever be.
Yesterday we had some more crazy weather around here. Another tornado watch and flooding all around the area. Our school site was okay, but the parking lot flooded. I had to move my car mid-day because they thought our cars might get stuck. I was nervous driving through such deep water with my little car. I actually didn’t know how deep it really was until I was walking back through the parking lot and the water was almost up to my knees.
Well I need to go prepare plans for my sub tomorrow. I am going to an inservice DynaVox training. One of my students does not speak and he uses a computer to communicate. The problem is I am his teacher and I do not know how to use it. Hopefully after tomorrow I will be able to teach him more effectively. I hope my kids do not tear up the sub – who knows maybe they will respect him more than they respect me. It may sound bad, but I am a little bit excited about being away from school for a day and I will get to sleep a little too! These 5 o’clock mornings are pulling me down.
Goodnight friends.
A snapshot of today or I should say a snapshot of the things that happened in about 15 minutes during today.
Student one: Copying down his spelling words writing bitch instead of batch.
Student Two: Hiding under my umbrella that is opened in the back of the classroom.
Student Three: Jumps up on the desk and does a round-off off the side.
Student Four: Pulls out a large ceramic cross out of his book sack (that’s backpack for all you NW folks)
Student Five: Is crying like a baby because she got detention for hitting someone.
Student Six: Is actually doing her work.
Student Seven: Is following me around like a lost puppy.
Student Eight: Writing on the white board in the back of the classroom because I told her not to write on the front board. (really what I meant was you should not be writing on the board at all)
Student Nine’s Grandma: Says I remind her of Mariah Carey.
Student Ten: Laying on the floor.
Student Eleven: Saying “no” to every phrase that comes out of my mouth.
Student Twelve: My encouragement - "Come on buddy, get your work done" and the response, "I want a big Mac"
And I had a few absent students today. Luckily, even when everyone is present, I do have a small class of only 15. I am so thankful that. I cannot imagine adding more to this Sullivan Circus.
Even though we obviously have a long way to go, I see glimpses of greatness from my students. For a few moments today the classroom was so quiet, it was incredible. Every student was busy doing what I asked them to do. Working hard, moving forward, being successful. What a crazy job this is, what crazy kids these are! I have found that the day runs a lot smoother if I allow time for my kids to simply be kids. They unfortunately do not have recess and somehow my class got jipped out of PE and Art, so each day I give them a little free time. Today they started to teach me the Soulja Boy dance. If you have not heard of it – check it out on www.YouTube.com then imagine Miss Sullivan doing this dance surrounded by all her little babies, who are by the way much more coordinated then I will ever be.
Yesterday we had some more crazy weather around here. Another tornado watch and flooding all around the area. Our school site was okay, but the parking lot flooded. I had to move my car mid-day because they thought our cars might get stuck. I was nervous driving through such deep water with my little car. I actually didn’t know how deep it really was until I was walking back through the parking lot and the water was almost up to my knees.
Well I need to go prepare plans for my sub tomorrow. I am going to an inservice DynaVox training. One of my students does not speak and he uses a computer to communicate. The problem is I am his teacher and I do not know how to use it. Hopefully after tomorrow I will be able to teach him more effectively. I hope my kids do not tear up the sub – who knows maybe they will respect him more than they respect me. It may sound bad, but I am a little bit excited about being away from school for a day and I will get to sleep a little too! These 5 o’clock mornings are pulling me down.
Goodnight friends.
Monday, October 22, 2007
Thursday, October 18, 2007
one dark morning
Even though I was using an umbrella for my short walk from the car to the office the rain soaked me. The sky was dark, the clouds were thick and our walkways began to flood. My shoes got wet and stayed wet for the entire day. I was the first teacher to arrive, walking in with the secretary. She said someone had just called and said something about a tornado. We got inside and check out weather.com:
Tornado Warning for 70128 (our exact zip code!)
Will be overhead at 7:05, moving across the area until 7:30 (it was currently 6:55)
And the best part of it all this is the advice that came next inthe report...
THE SAFEST PLACE TO BE DURING A TORNADO IS IN A BASEMENT. GET UNDER A WORKBENCH OR OTHER PIECE OF STURDY FURNITURE. IF NO BASEMENT IS AVAILABLE...SEEK SHELTER ON THE LOWEST FLOOR OF THE BUILDING IN AN INTERIOR HALLWAY OR ROOM SUCH AS A CLOSET. USE BLANKETS OR PILLOWS TO COVER YOUR BODY AND ALWAYS STAY AWAY FROM WINDOWS.
IF IN MOBILE HOMES OR VEHICLES...EVACUATE THEM AND GET INSIDE A SUBSTANTIAL SHELTER. IF NO SHELTER IS AVAILABLE...LIE FLAT IN THE NEAREST DITCH OR OTHER LOW SPOT AND COVER YOUR HEAD WITH YOUR HANDS.
Now first of all a basement? Really? So we can drown in the flood waters? Nobody has basements here. So we are standing in the "office" with windows all around and certainly wihtout any sturdy furniture. We are on the lowest floor, but our entire school just happens to be a trailer park...was "lie flat in the nearest ditch or other low spot and cover your head with your hands" really our best option? It was funny at first read, but then I started getting a little freaked out.
Once the rain gave up I headed back to my classroom feeling a bit better since the rain stopped I thought we were good to go. Just as soon as I got into my room by myself the wind roared and the rain began to pound down again. I informed the other teacher in my building that I wasn't going to die in building 6 and started to head out of there. Apparently everyone thought it was funny how nervous I was with tears in my eyes, but then again these are the same people who have told me they have never visited the west coast before because of earthquakes...
In the end, we were just left with one breathtaking rainbow to remind me that no matter how rough the storm may be, I will make it through.
Tornado Warning for 70128 (our exact zip code!)
Will be overhead at 7:05, moving across the area until 7:30 (it was currently 6:55)
And the best part of it all this is the advice that came next inthe report...
THE SAFEST PLACE TO BE DURING A TORNADO IS IN A BASEMENT. GET UNDER A WORKBENCH OR OTHER PIECE OF STURDY FURNITURE. IF NO BASEMENT IS AVAILABLE...SEEK SHELTER ON THE LOWEST FLOOR OF THE BUILDING IN AN INTERIOR HALLWAY OR ROOM SUCH AS A CLOSET. USE BLANKETS OR PILLOWS TO COVER YOUR BODY AND ALWAYS STAY AWAY FROM WINDOWS.
IF IN MOBILE HOMES OR VEHICLES...EVACUATE THEM AND GET INSIDE A SUBSTANTIAL SHELTER. IF NO SHELTER IS AVAILABLE...LIE FLAT IN THE NEAREST DITCH OR OTHER LOW SPOT AND COVER YOUR HEAD WITH YOUR HANDS.
Now first of all a basement? Really? So we can drown in the flood waters? Nobody has basements here. So we are standing in the "office" with windows all around and certainly wihtout any sturdy furniture. We are on the lowest floor, but our entire school just happens to be a trailer park...was "lie flat in the nearest ditch or other low spot and cover your head with your hands" really our best option? It was funny at first read, but then I started getting a little freaked out.
Once the rain gave up I headed back to my classroom feeling a bit better since the rain stopped I thought we were good to go. Just as soon as I got into my room by myself the wind roared and the rain began to pound down again. I informed the other teacher in my building that I wasn't going to die in building 6 and started to head out of there. Apparently everyone thought it was funny how nervous I was with tears in my eyes, but then again these are the same people who have told me they have never visited the west coast before because of earthquakes...
In the end, we were just left with one breathtaking rainbow to remind me that no matter how rough the storm may be, I will make it through.
Monday, October 8, 2007
my vision
As a teacher in this community I will be humble. I will come with a spirit motivated by positive change and growth. I will be prepared to be a leader and ensure that these students are moving forward. I will not be overbearing, but humbled by my limited amount of experience. I will strive for increased achievement in myself as I serve my students. I will not only expect great success from my students, but also from myself. At all times I will focus myself on what I can do to be better as a teacher so that my students truly do achieve all that they can. I will encourage my students daily and instill in them the value of hard work so that they will develop an independent desire to be successful. I will be a model of hard work for my students and in the community by continuously striving for excellence in all that I do.
Sunday, October 7, 2007
there's no place like home
I cannot believe that I have already been teaching for over a month. I have doubled my teaching experience since institute. I am so overwhelmed by all the work I have to do for TFA, my certification program, my class, and my school. My life is consumed by my work. But I guess that is what I came down here to do. I had such great teachers and went to wonderful schools. I feel confident in my public school education. It is not fair that so many kids do not have that opportunity. It is the least I can do to give two years to show my appreciation and help as I am able.
I am learning some new words and phrases down here:
arer = “r”
arnge = orange
making groceries = going grocery shopping
saving groceries = putting them away
cutting up = goofing off
making 23 = turning 23
what ta do? = what am I supposed to be doing
I gotta use it = I need to go to the bathroom
pernt = point
One of my students told me that I should go back to Oregon. I could be really sad about it, but I really think that deep down this student really likes me – he just hasn’t figured it out yet. How’s that for optimism? I am not quite that optimistic about much else. We have been in school for over a month and my classroom management is still struggling. The students are very disrespectful of each other – calling other students names and kicking and shoving them. One of my students has in-school suspension all day on Monday because he is constantly getting in trouble. He finally pushed it too far in the cafeteria and got sent right to the principal’s office. This student is such a struggle for me. He is very smart and FUNNY! He is definitely the class clown and sometimes it is really hard for me not to laugh at him, but he needs to learn that during school is not his time to be putting on a show for everyone. He is so disrespectful and distracting! It is quite ironic that his little sister, a little kindergartener, has taken to me. She always seems to find me on my most frustrating days. She always gives me huge hugs around the legs, she kisses my hand and tells me that she loves me.
According to the district's set schedule I am behind already on what I should be teaching my students. This week was so hard because they had to take their district benchmark and also this tracking diagnostic required by Teach for America. They were dying from all the tests!!! I need to be more efficient with my planning so I can really utilize all the time I have with them and make it meaningful.
Having both my sisters and mom in the education world I always knew that teaching was a hard job, but I never knew it was going to be this hard. There is always more to be done and it is hard to prioritize. I don’t think you can understand really what all goes into teaching until you are in the middle of it. I asked my students what they thought I did when I went home after school. Their responses were: plan for tomorrow, make stuff for us, grade our papers…I would have liked to be offended and tell them about all the great things I am doing after work, but I guess even my students know I have no life.
I have this fear of one of someone throwing up in my class. It seems silly, it shouldn’t really be that big of a deal. I just know my students would probably go berserk and not be very nice about it, plus its just eeehhhhh. Anyway the point is I was sitting at my desk enjoying some yogurt when one of the other 3rd grade teachers comes in to talk to me. She was asking me some questions and then suddenly she just puked all over the floor next to and under my desk. She was literally no more that 3 feet away from me. All I could do was stand up and leave my classroom as fast as possible. Such a nurturing person I am, huh? Poor lady.
On a brighter note I got to go to the LSU vs. Tulane game last weekend. It was so fun to be in the Superdome and ahhh I love FOOTBALL! I wish they would let me play it. The Teach for America Corps members who are graduates of LSU and Tulane got to go down on the field and be recognized – you may have seen it on ESPN.
I am really missing “home”. I miss my family and I miss my friends. And I miss the beautiful NORTHWEST! I miss being comfortable. Even though I have met some great people I have also realized that it just takes time to get really close to someone. I need some good hugs and cuddle time.
But I got the greatest news….KJ is coming!!! My roommate of three, basically four years in Seattle is taking a trip down here from Colorado over Thanksgiving. I am so pumped. It will be amazing to have a little bit of “family” around for the holiday. Only 39 days…
I am so thankful for all the nice e-mails, phone calls, and letters that I have been receiving. They are what keep me going each day. It is such an amazing feeling to know that so many of you are thinking and praying for me. I am starting a wall of notes and always share them with my roommates. I am so lucky to have such tremendous support.
I am learning some new words and phrases down here:
arer = “r”
arnge = orange
making groceries = going grocery shopping
saving groceries = putting them away
cutting up = goofing off
making 23 = turning 23
what ta do? = what am I supposed to be doing
I gotta use it = I need to go to the bathroom
pernt = point
One of my students told me that I should go back to Oregon. I could be really sad about it, but I really think that deep down this student really likes me – he just hasn’t figured it out yet. How’s that for optimism? I am not quite that optimistic about much else. We have been in school for over a month and my classroom management is still struggling. The students are very disrespectful of each other – calling other students names and kicking and shoving them. One of my students has in-school suspension all day on Monday because he is constantly getting in trouble. He finally pushed it too far in the cafeteria and got sent right to the principal’s office. This student is such a struggle for me. He is very smart and FUNNY! He is definitely the class clown and sometimes it is really hard for me not to laugh at him, but he needs to learn that during school is not his time to be putting on a show for everyone. He is so disrespectful and distracting! It is quite ironic that his little sister, a little kindergartener, has taken to me. She always seems to find me on my most frustrating days. She always gives me huge hugs around the legs, she kisses my hand and tells me that she loves me.
According to the district's set schedule I am behind already on what I should be teaching my students. This week was so hard because they had to take their district benchmark and also this tracking diagnostic required by Teach for America. They were dying from all the tests!!! I need to be more efficient with my planning so I can really utilize all the time I have with them and make it meaningful.
Having both my sisters and mom in the education world I always knew that teaching was a hard job, but I never knew it was going to be this hard. There is always more to be done and it is hard to prioritize. I don’t think you can understand really what all goes into teaching until you are in the middle of it. I asked my students what they thought I did when I went home after school. Their responses were: plan for tomorrow, make stuff for us, grade our papers…I would have liked to be offended and tell them about all the great things I am doing after work, but I guess even my students know I have no life.
I have this fear of one of someone throwing up in my class. It seems silly, it shouldn’t really be that big of a deal. I just know my students would probably go berserk and not be very nice about it, plus its just eeehhhhh. Anyway the point is I was sitting at my desk enjoying some yogurt when one of the other 3rd grade teachers comes in to talk to me. She was asking me some questions and then suddenly she just puked all over the floor next to and under my desk. She was literally no more that 3 feet away from me. All I could do was stand up and leave my classroom as fast as possible. Such a nurturing person I am, huh? Poor lady.
On a brighter note I got to go to the LSU vs. Tulane game last weekend. It was so fun to be in the Superdome and ahhh I love FOOTBALL! I wish they would let me play it. The Teach for America Corps members who are graduates of LSU and Tulane got to go down on the field and be recognized – you may have seen it on ESPN.
I am really missing “home”. I miss my family and I miss my friends. And I miss the beautiful NORTHWEST! I miss being comfortable. Even though I have met some great people I have also realized that it just takes time to get really close to someone. I need some good hugs and cuddle time.
But I got the greatest news….KJ is coming!!! My roommate of three, basically four years in Seattle is taking a trip down here from Colorado over Thanksgiving. I am so pumped. It will be amazing to have a little bit of “family” around for the holiday. Only 39 days…
I am so thankful for all the nice e-mails, phone calls, and letters that I have been receiving. They are what keep me going each day. It is such an amazing feeling to know that so many of you are thinking and praying for me. I am starting a wall of notes and always share them with my roommates. I am so lucky to have such tremendous support.
Monday, September 24, 2007
a picture update
even with all the chaos we are still sneaking in some fun
attack of the love bugs
a close up for those of you have not experienced their glory
the best greeting on my way to work
painted new each day
goodmorning sunshine
the speedy makeover
meet Nigel and his friends
what you need to kill a cockroach
-1 fly swatter
-1 broom
-1 math book with a paper towel taped to it
-2 roommates
once we got it i didn't want to get off the math book
and this is the reason I am here
we tried to take a serious picture
but silly faces were just so much more fun
attack of the love bugs
a close up for those of you have not experienced their glory
the best greeting on my way to work
painted new each day
goodmorning sunshine
the speedy makeover
meet Nigel and his friends
what you need to kill a cockroach
-1 fly swatter
-1 broom
-1 math book with a paper towel taped to it
-2 roommates
once we got it i didn't want to get off the math book
and this is the reason I am here
we tried to take a serious picture
but silly faces were just so much more fun
Saturday, September 15, 2007
week two: ch-ch-check
I made it through week two. We had our ups and downs, but overall I feel good about it. I am realizing just how crazy this whole experience is. Each day I am learning more about this community and through that learning about myself. Yesterday was crazy, maybe because it was Friday, it was raining and they are getting a little too comfortable. I am not quite sure what the students deal was. I have never seen such disrespect. They really just have no sense of respect – I wonder how they say the things they do and not feel ashamed. A couple of sixth graders were mouthing off to me because I asked them to stop talking while the principal was making the announcements. One girl said, “I don’t give a shit” and the boy next to her said, “My mama says I can say whatever the fuck I want.” It was all I could do to stop my jaw from dropping. How can you say that to a teacher? How can you say that to anyone? It makes me so embarrassed for them.
I am so glad my students are at the age where they still have some sense of intimidation from adults. I do not want them to be afraid of me – I just want respect and for them to respect their classmates too! It kills me when I see or hear them being so mean and rude to each other. Its crazy, they know how bad it feels when someone says something mean to them, but they always snap right back. They need to learn to hold their tongues. I think I need to have a little mini lesson on the golden rule next week.
I question why these kids think they are kings and queens. Why are they so mean? What makes them calloused? And then it hit me, how naive can I be? These third graders have had so many hard and tragic experiences in their few years. A big brother died of cancer when he was 13. One wears the same clothes(that are not in uniform) everyday – they get dirtier and dirtier each day. He told me that his mom didn’t have enough money to pick him up and take him to the hotel and that is why he couldn’t get his papers signed. A cousin of one of my students fell from the roof when they were waiting to get rescued off of a roof after Katrina. She was 3 years old, she drowned in the floodwaters. A father was shot in the head and burned to death just last year. They have lost family members, they have witnessed violence, they lived through one of the most destructive natural disasters in history. How can I come in and compare my experience as a third grader with their lives? It is just not fair. I need to be understanding and loving, but I can’t make excuses for them. They need to learn that our classroom is a safe place for them. A place where respect for all is mandatory and a place to feel comfortable and express themselves in a positive way.
Then of course there is the fact that they do need to learn A LOT. I need to teach them everything to help them pass the third grade! They are so far behind and at so many different levels. One will finish the entire assignment before three others have even written their name on the paper. With only 12 students I am already struggling to make it around the room to hold them accountable for staying focused, help them each step along the way, or give them enrichment activities if necessary. I just want them to want it for themselves. They don’t know how to work hard – they are missing the dedication, I need to get them invested. I am so far from where I need to be as a teacher. This is the most difficult thing I have ever done. How do I give these children all they deserve and need.
I am so confused and upset about how behind most of them are. How is it possible to make it to the third grade without being able to read and barely write. What did their past teachers have them do? Were they just excused from doing the work because they couldn’t read the directions? What do their parents/families think?
Sometime tomorrow I am going to have to head over to Fannie C. so get some work done in my classroom. We have our open house on Monday and I really want my room to look good. I am sure the construction workers will be there to heckle me. They are always working hard to get our school completed – they are there when I get to school before seven and when I leave at 5. They like to make comments like, “What grade are you in?” or “YOU are the teacher?” They think they are so funny.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
love bugs
I learned today:
I have a long way to go before I become the teacher I want to be.
Love bugs are actually real bugs who are eternally mating at this time of year.
I am afraid of loosing the people I love the most.
I love to BBQ.
Things are a lot funnier when you are overwhlemed.
"Sweet eyes" is my new favorite term of the South.
I have a long way to go before I become the teacher I want to be.
Love bugs are actually real bugs who are eternally mating at this time of year.
I am afraid of loosing the people I love the most.
I love to BBQ.
Things are a lot funnier when you are overwhlemed.
"Sweet eyes" is my new favorite term of the South.
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
funny comment of the day
As I was walking down the hall I hear:
"She be walking like she be on the Tyra Banks Show"
"She be walking like she be on the Tyra Banks Show"
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
Monday, September 3, 2007
excited
I can't write much because I should be sleeping right now.
Just wanted to say, WOW!
I am so excited to meet my kids and get a glimpse at what this
experience is really going to be like. This is it, there is no turning
back now. My classroom is decorated a bit, of course not as cool
or complete as I would like. I guess I have plenty of time to fix it
up. I have spend a lot of time on the phone to my sisters and mom
getting advice on anything and everything. I have been changing things
up right to the last minute. I also went to Maggie's cousin's mother-in-law's
(as if that is not confusing!) 3rd grade classroom over on the West Bank today.
She gave me some books, so my bookcase is no longer empty!!! I really
need to work on getting some more books for the poor kiddos!
My other TFAers who have alreadystarted teaching have been amazing
as well. Tiff and Carmen are awesome, so calming and its cool since they
had the first day/week experience so recently! Alright, off to bed....send your
prayers my way and thank you so much to all of you who are so
awesome and supportive!!!
Just wanted to say, WOW!
I am so excited to meet my kids and get a glimpse at what this
experience is really going to be like. This is it, there is no turning
back now. My classroom is decorated a bit, of course not as cool
or complete as I would like. I guess I have plenty of time to fix it
up. I have spend a lot of time on the phone to my sisters and mom
getting advice on anything and everything. I have been changing things
up right to the last minute. I also went to Maggie's cousin's mother-in-law's
(as if that is not confusing!) 3rd grade classroom over on the West Bank today.
She gave me some books, so my bookcase is no longer empty!!! I really
need to work on getting some more books for the poor kiddos!
My other TFAers who have alreadystarted teaching have been amazing
as well. Tiff and Carmen are awesome, so calming and its cool since they
had the first day/week experience so recently! Alright, off to bed....send your
prayers my way and thank you so much to all of you who are so
awesome and supportive!!!
Friday, August 31, 2007
This and That
We built a fence in our front yard. It was a lot of work, but so much fun. We got to spend some time in the sun, have some roommate bonding, use power tools, and we met a lot of our neighbors. Think our neighbors thought we were crazy, they all came out to see what these new white girls in the ‘hood’ were doing out in the 113 degree weather!
……………………………………………………………
Its crazy how our neighborhood community has built. We have met so many nice people and they all say they’ve got our backs. For all the violence I hear about it the new everyday, I feel pretty safe here. Just in the past week we have had some surprising occurrences. Two young boys came separately seeking tutoring and this other man came to ask for advice because his buddy cut himself (this cut was so sick and deep, by the way). He said he heard we were teachers and he thought we might know what to do or where he should go to get medical help. I thought to myself, why is this man who is old enough to be my father coming to me for advice. I am just a 22 year old college graduate. Suddenly it hit me…I am a college graduate and for the first time in my life that is not the norm for the people around me.
……………………………………………………………
Only in New Orleans will you go to a school district convocation where,
-there is a brass band playing
-1,000 teachers are dancing
-old, young, fat, skinny, white, and black ladies are pulling out their umbrellas to dance with and breaking it down in the aisles
-the mayor stops mid speech when a lady yells something out and says, “oh, I’m sorry baby I didn’t hear you”
-the ice breaker for your school is making up a dance to a Beyonce song and performing it as a group
……………………………………………………………
Sail away….sail away…sail away
Last Saturday afternoon was my dream summer day. Wilhelmina’s Grandpa affectionately known as Pere Pere took us out sailing on Lake Ponchartrain. It was great weather – a beautiful blue sky and bright sunshine. We had snacks, talked, napped out on the deck and went swimming in the lake. I was blown away that the water was actually warm – I have never experienced a warm lake before. I convinced Lizzy to jump in just as we got caught in some strong wind. Luckily I was holding onto a rope on the back of the boat so I just got dragged along, I did have my camera in the water with me, but I managed to keep it dry. But the thing was, Lizzy jumped in and couldn’t catch up to the boat and before we knew it she was left behind, just a dot in the massive lake. Not so good. Everything ended up fine, Pere Pere is quite the captain and brought the lady over board back on board quickly. Speaking of Pere Pere, he is such an amazing man – he makes me not get sad about getting old. He is living it up taking piano lessons, sailing, choir, among other things.
……………………………………………………………
I found out that I will be teaching 3rd grade self-contained at Fannie C. Williams Elementary School. When I got the news I suddenly felt that this was all real. I am going to be responsible for these students. It is my job to ensure that these kids make ‘significant gains’ and keep them safe. There are still so many uncertainties. Only four days until the students will pour into our school. A school that as of today, is not complete. The modular campus is being constructed just next door to the old building. It is so crazy to see the effects of Katrina still so visible in New Orleans East where I will be teaching. The school is near Lake Ponchartrain where the floodgates broke. This area got up to 20+ feet of water. Many houses, grocery stores, and businesses are still abandoned and closed. The six flags has no prospect of opening anytime soon – the sign out front still says ‘ closed for storm’ with a few letters missing. Our original school building was brand new pre-Katrina, now it just sits gutted. They say it would cost 180% more to fix it up then just demolish it and start from scratch. Our ‘trailer park’ next door doesn’t look too glamorous from the outside, but we have been told we have one of the nicest set-ups in the district. It was supposed to be a high school, so we have some extra space for the little ones. It will be nice that we will start the year with clean and brand new classrooms. No matter how frustrated I get with how poorly the Recovery School District is run I still remind myself that this is a new district in a broken school system with new leadership and quite a vision for growth. I am lucky enough to be working under a very enthusiastic, fun, young, organized and hard working principal, Mrs. Batiste. One of the greatest values that she brings is the importance of “whole child” instruction. We have art, music, PE, and library/media time allotted for out students each day. These are the things that help students love school, find what they are good at, learn about heath, get some energy out, express themselves, and hopefully gain some confidence, and work ethic.
……………………………………………………………
Its crazy how our neighborhood community has built. We have met so many nice people and they all say they’ve got our backs. For all the violence I hear about it the new everyday, I feel pretty safe here. Just in the past week we have had some surprising occurrences. Two young boys came separately seeking tutoring and this other man came to ask for advice because his buddy cut himself (this cut was so sick and deep, by the way). He said he heard we were teachers and he thought we might know what to do or where he should go to get medical help. I thought to myself, why is this man who is old enough to be my father coming to me for advice. I am just a 22 year old college graduate. Suddenly it hit me…I am a college graduate and for the first time in my life that is not the norm for the people around me.
……………………………………………………………
Only in New Orleans will you go to a school district convocation where,
-there is a brass band playing
-1,000 teachers are dancing
-old, young, fat, skinny, white, and black ladies are pulling out their umbrellas to dance with and breaking it down in the aisles
-the mayor stops mid speech when a lady yells something out and says, “oh, I’m sorry baby I didn’t hear you”
-the ice breaker for your school is making up a dance to a Beyonce song and performing it as a group
……………………………………………………………
Sail away….sail away…sail away
Last Saturday afternoon was my dream summer day. Wilhelmina’s Grandpa affectionately known as Pere Pere took us out sailing on Lake Ponchartrain. It was great weather – a beautiful blue sky and bright sunshine. We had snacks, talked, napped out on the deck and went swimming in the lake. I was blown away that the water was actually warm – I have never experienced a warm lake before. I convinced Lizzy to jump in just as we got caught in some strong wind. Luckily I was holding onto a rope on the back of the boat so I just got dragged along, I did have my camera in the water with me, but I managed to keep it dry. But the thing was, Lizzy jumped in and couldn’t catch up to the boat and before we knew it she was left behind, just a dot in the massive lake. Not so good. Everything ended up fine, Pere Pere is quite the captain and brought the lady over board back on board quickly. Speaking of Pere Pere, he is such an amazing man – he makes me not get sad about getting old. He is living it up taking piano lessons, sailing, choir, among other things.
……………………………………………………………
I found out that I will be teaching 3rd grade self-contained at Fannie C. Williams Elementary School. When I got the news I suddenly felt that this was all real. I am going to be responsible for these students. It is my job to ensure that these kids make ‘significant gains’ and keep them safe. There are still so many uncertainties. Only four days until the students will pour into our school. A school that as of today, is not complete. The modular campus is being constructed just next door to the old building. It is so crazy to see the effects of Katrina still so visible in New Orleans East where I will be teaching. The school is near Lake Ponchartrain where the floodgates broke. This area got up to 20+ feet of water. Many houses, grocery stores, and businesses are still abandoned and closed. The six flags has no prospect of opening anytime soon – the sign out front still says ‘ closed for storm’ with a few letters missing. Our original school building was brand new pre-Katrina, now it just sits gutted. They say it would cost 180% more to fix it up then just demolish it and start from scratch. Our ‘trailer park’ next door doesn’t look too glamorous from the outside, but we have been told we have one of the nicest set-ups in the district. It was supposed to be a high school, so we have some extra space for the little ones. It will be nice that we will start the year with clean and brand new classrooms. No matter how frustrated I get with how poorly the Recovery School District is run I still remind myself that this is a new district in a broken school system with new leadership and quite a vision for growth. I am lucky enough to be working under a very enthusiastic, fun, young, organized and hard working principal, Mrs. Batiste. One of the greatest values that she brings is the importance of “whole child” instruction. We have art, music, PE, and library/media time allotted for out students each day. These are the things that help students love school, find what they are good at, learn about heath, get some energy out, express themselves, and hopefully gain some confidence, and work ethic.
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